Lullabies
by Billyjenkinsmith
Summary: I do not own Death Note or any of the characters therein. That being said, this is an OOC about Matt mourning the loss of his friendship with Mello. My second fic, guys...Go easy? :D The song is Lullabies by All Time Low.


My second OOC Matt and Mello songfic. Review? :D Reviews make me fluffy on the inside.

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I turned the light on in my room and looked around. I glanced behind me, hoping he was there. I sighed, seeing he wasn't, and walked in, closing the door. It was three AM and I'd been up all night just thinking. Finally all my caffeine and adrenaline had worn off, and it was time to try and sleep.

_Make it a sweet, sweet goodbye - it could be for the last time and it's not right. "Don't let yourself get in over your head," he said. Alone and far from home we'll find you..._

I'd begged. I'd pleaded, and gotten no response at all. He was my one true friend, and nothing could move him to see me. I looked at his ring on my hand. I felt the tears start to well up. No. Not now, I thought, and held the ring close to me, stemming the flow of tears. I looked over at the bed. A flash of his figure curled up on it was all it took. I began to cry, softly enough so no one else in the house could hear it. I finally wracked up enough nerve to climb into my own bed.

_Dead - Like a candle you burned out; spill the wax over the spaces left in place of angry words._  
_Scream - To be heard, like you needed any more attention; throw the bottle, break the door, and disappear._

I felt dead. I felt like someone had come and ripped my heart open, leaving me to bleed and cry like the child I was. I'd pushed too hard, and pushed him away. Far away. He was out, having great times...Without me. We were Matt and Mello! We were always supposed to be together! I sighed. Why couldn't I just keep my damn mouth shut? Honesty never got you anywhere, you fool, I thought to myself. I crashed my head into the pillow, sobbing.

_Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams, waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."_

I rolled over onto my back and stared at the ceiling. I just wanted my friend back. **Give me my friend back**, I wished out loud. Was he thinking of me at all? He said he needed time and space when all I needed was for him to be closer. I just wanted my friend back, and that was too much to ask. I groaned; this was torture.

_Forever's never seemed so long as when you're not around it's like a piece of me is missing. I could have learned so much from you but what's left now?_  
_Don't you realize you shot this family a world of pain? Can't you see there should have been a happy ending we let go?_

I w_It literally felt like a chunk of me had broken off and gone away. This pain was unbearable. I sat up and made up his side of the bed, just in case, you know? Right? I always want to be ready...In case he comes "home," I thought. I wondered if he considered this place a home to him at all. We were his family, after all. Well, WERE. I don't know what his thoughts on us were now...His thoughts on me._

_Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams, waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."_

I rolled my legs over the side of the bed and just sat there, head in hands. Was there nothing I could do? I shook my head back and forth, back and forth. **I miss you. I'm so sorry**, I said out loud. Loud enough for anyone to hear; I didn't care anymore. He's probably done with me anyway...You really fucked up this time, Matty. You really fucked up this time. I finally lied down on my right side and closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep.

_Sing me to sleep_.

I remembered cuddling and laughing together.

_Sing me to sleep_.

I remembered crying and just holding each other.

_Sing me to sleep_.

I remembered everything.

_Sing me to s..._

**This was a joke**, I thought, rolling my legs over the side of the bed again and getting up. T**here's no way I can sleep tonight. I hardly slept last night. Hell, I've hardly slept any night since he's been gone. One more night won't kill me...**

_Sing me to sleep (You've taken so much with you...) I'll see you in my dreams, (But left the worst with me...), waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."_  
_I'm sorry, I'm sorry._

I turned off the light, and made my way out of the room. A quick glance at the clock revealed it was now five AM. **I bet he's sound asleep**, I thought. I gave a sad grin. **Good. I wouldn't want him to feel this way...** And I slowly made my way down the stairs.


End file.
